A couple of short stories.

Spent the last half hour of tonight writing a couple of responses to Reddit’s Writing-Prompts

While many of your brethren secretly maintain various positions of power around the world, you’re not hiding the fact that you’re a Reptilian (Thus proving your species is real.) as you run for office.

They call me “Bob”.

It’s not my real name of course, my real name is unpronounceable in human tongue, so I use “Bob” for lack of imagination really.

At first when I declared my candidacy I was mostly ignored. Relegated to the minor leagues, cast adrift, hard up for even getting my own family to agree to give me their vote.

Then one day I finally managed to get a local reporter to come interview me in my home.

It all seemed to go well, to start with. She asked me about my policy and I answered her questions. Nothing special. Just your standard right-wing authoritarian answers to standard liberal nonsense questions.

Then she asked about the conspiracy.

I laughed. We all laugh when we’re asked about it, though that doesn’t happen often. Only David Icke ever really believed the truth, so laughing works well to diffuse the situation.

But she just stared. Continued staring. There was something in her eyes. Something perceptive. Something deep.

I stared back, unblinking.

Then I blinked, but I got my shape-shifting confused. I blinked the wrong way, using my second eyelids. My sideways eyelids.

I expected her to freak out, I expected to have to eat her, devour her soul like so many others.

But she just nodded. “I thought so,” she said nonchalantly, “and would the lizard-people be in favour of freedom for all earthlings, lizard and human alike?”

I was stunned at her acceptance really. In our myths, in our stories, in all our literature, the humans go insane and try to wipe us out every time they see through us to understand the truth. But not her. Not Sally.

Sally just wanted to know about my policy, not caring that I was a shape-shifting-lizard from another dimension. She only cared about my tax policy and the way I interpreted the constitution.

“Well, of course all people, be they human or reptilian, should have equal rights!” I found myself exclaiming by the end of the night. Not sure that I’d believed that until then really. I’d kind of been programmed from birth to think of the lizards as natural rulers, while the people were natural prey.

Upon reflection, Sally was perhaps not only the reporter that exposed me, who made humanity realize the truth, but also the person who made me realize the truth too.

We are all of course equal. Not only the races, but also the species.

My campaign went well after that. it turns out that lizard stories of humanity’s reaction to the strange, the different, the cold-blooded, were exaggerated. All they ever wanted was honesty.

And honesty, in the end, it why I got all those votes.

The lizards in the opposition kept denying, kept lying, kept bending the truth to their favour. All I ever did was say, “Yeah, course I’m a Lizard, all the powerful are, but I’m a lizard who will support YOU!”

So now I’m the first Lizard president, and I expect all the other Lizards to come out to, we CAN all be equal!

— Speech given by president “Bob” Lizard, on his appointment as president on 2016.

There’s good news and bad news. The good news is that the cancer will kill you.

“Well, Mister Lazarus, there’s good news and bad news”.

I cringed, who wouldn’t.

“Give me the bad news doc.”

“The biopsy shows that the sample is malignant, it’s growing. The cancer is inoperable and will spread to your whole body, you have only a few months to live. Maybe a couple of years, at the outside.”

Wow. That’s certainly a blow.

“And the good news?” I asked.

“The cancer is a strange one, mister Lazarus, it seems to be differentiating according to signals from the cells adjacent to it. It’s growing, certainly, but it’s also /changing/, like stem-cells spread throughout your whole body.”


“What does that mean, exactly?”

“Well, we don’t know, to be honest. The cancer is changing to muscle cells in your muscles, to lung cells in your lungs, to bone cells in your bones. The cancer in your brain has already taken over nearly fifty percent of your cells there. To judge by your charts I’m talking as much to the cancer itself as I am you you at this moment. In a week, maybe two, there’ll be more cancer than there is human”


“So, again, I don’t really know what this means.”

“As I say, mister Lazarus, it’s confusing to us too. But at a guess, and you understand this can be no more than a guess, your cancer will outlive you. Maybe outlive us all.”

I looked blankly at him.

“Your cancer is likely sentient, likely taking over your memories, your personality. It may well outlive us all.”